1. He pouts like an aggresive trout.
2. He only wears polo shirts.
3. He smashes vases on his head for fun.
4. He has two heads.
5. He is a sex God.
6. He smiles while peeing.
7. He suffers from chronic flatulence.
8. He is pinocchio.
9. His favourite film is Titanic.
10. He’s partial to the older lady.
11. His lips are magnetic.
12. He comes in like a wrecking ball.
13. His mouth turns into a black hole without warning.
14. He’s shit scared of spiders.
This is a spoof article